Last Saturday, I was invited to an Indian house party. Thought to write down to explain that we, PhD holders, refuse to change despite of our involvement in the Swatchh Bharat. My Chinese friend and I were welcomed at the reception by a sentence: “I am single and ready to mingle.” This was a family party with children and only two friends joined without their partners. My friend was requested by the gentleman H to call his female colleague. His expectation was that his Chinese colleague would join the party to meet another Chinese lady. My friend left a message as there was no response from the other side. As a smart guy H is, he quickly responded that she might be sleeping as Chinese women sleep at 7 PM and it was 9 PM. H showed his depth of knowledge about Chinese women. When I came to know this, I told H and others that it was wrong. After some time, I looked for my friend. She was talking with H and S outside of the party room as H wanted to have a cigarette. I also joined.
Four of us were having discussion when H mentioned he worked for Pfizer. My friend asked more about Pfizer. Single and ready to mingle famed colleague told that Pfizer makes Viagra. This was a clear message to the world/China that we are from the land of Kamasutra. Now S left and we came inside where ST joined us. I was standing at the door and facing ST, my friend was right side of me and H was left side of me. H shared his chocolate with us and then, instead of taking the shortest path to the door, H took a curvaceous path that was encircling us. In that way, he tried to grab the lower back of my friend while passing through the door. My friend immediately caught my upper right arms and asked, “Is he your friend?” I gave a expression that I did not understand. She said, “He is the male version of a bitch.” Next, she told me what happened. She wanted me to confront him. I told her that I had only two options in such case: 1. a physical fight, 2. call a police. I explained her that he would deny and rest of people would tell it was unintentionally. My preference was the second choice but again we gave up the idea as organizer might have not liked that. So we stayed there for a while and left immediately.
Today, in a discussion, few party friends told me that it was my mistake and I should have confronted/warned/slapped him. I accepted my mistake and realized PhD can not make us a better human being despite of our daily discussion on how to stop rapes.
Parmit Singh Dhurandhar